Close my eyes at night–even before I sleep similarly brilliant colors explode inside my eyelids. I’ve kept quiet after mentioning it earlier in life when others were incredulous and said they didn’t have it happen–I felt like an outcast. Now I am brave enough to reveal that I see things in front of my eyes–colors and objects, moving and swimming, flowing, receding, advancing. The tension of color is a hallmark in my work besides the design and composition. Last year a psychiatrist upon observing my art suggested that he would like to spend time with me and find out what is going on in my head. He said there is some awfully unusual things in there. I was completely taken aback–I felt like an oddity–a zoo animal under glass–or a freak. I did not agree to his inquiry and outwardly let it go but it stayed in the recess of my mind. I am not really certain what triggers it but as an artist its valuable and I am able to bring it to a canvas or sketchbook and let my hands find the way to express the images. I think Tim Leary was on the right track about tuning into oneself and actualizing ones dreams–being self-reliant. Thanks Dr. Tim for the great words.
Leary later explained in his 1983 autobiography Flashbacks:
“Turn on” meant go within to activate your neural and genetic equipment. Become sensitive to the many and various levels of consciousness and the specific triggers that engage them. Drugs were one way to accomplish this end. “Tune in” meant interact harmoniously with the world around you – externalize, materialize, express your new internal perspectives. “Drop out” suggested an active, selective, graceful process of detachment from involuntary or unconscious commitments. “Drop Out” meant self-reliance, a discovery of one’s singularity, a commitment to mobility, choice, and change. Unhappily my explanations of this sequence of personal development were often misinterpreted to mean “Get stoned and abandon all constructive activity”.[4]